Celebrated Nigerian author, Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie, has revealed her personal battle with depression, a struggle that almost silenced her passion for fiction writing.
Speaking in an interview with CNN Africa, Adichie admitted that she went through a deeply unhappy period, describing it as “a constant shadow” that was difficult to escape.
“I was fighting depression. In that period, just deeply unhappy. Deeply unhappy. And there are ways to try and hide your unhappiness, but you know, it’s there. It’s a constant sort of shadow with you. And it’s not a good place to be,” she said.
Writing Block and Pain of Losing Fiction
The author of Half of a Yellow Sun and Americanah disclosed that one of the hardest parts of her struggle was being unable to write fiction — the very thing she loves most.
“So in the years that I couldn’t write, and really not being able to write fiction when fiction is a thing that you deeply love… it’s just a terrible place to be,” she explained.
Coping Through Distraction and Poetry
Adichie said she tried filling the void with activities such as giving speeches, hoping inspiration would strike, but it only left her more miserable.
She eventually found solace in reading books and poetry, which became a safe space and a way to reconnect with language during the difficult season.
“I read the books I love. I read a lot more poetry in that period because poetry really helps with language. But also in the end, it’s just about waiting and hoping. You’re not in control of this thing,” she added.
Finding Creativity Again
Adichie described her creativity as a spiritual experience, likening it to voices of “ancestors and spirits” speaking stories through her.
She celebrated the release of her new novel, Dream Count, calling it a personal victory after surviving the dark period.
“I’m grateful that I finished it, finally. I’m grateful that it’s out. I’m grateful that it’s found its readers. I’m grateful that, in some ways, really, honestly, it’s kind of everything I hoped it would be,” she said joyfully.
